15 Ridiculous Reasons Your Kids Hate You

Being hated by your kids is a rite of passage for most mums and dads. If you’re not one of them then don’t feel bad, you’re probably just a perfect parent.

And for that I feel sorry for you, because it means you shall never know the hilarious reasons kids give for not liking you.

Every day one or all of my three children takes great pleasure in explaining why they:

  • Aren’t my friend
  • Think I am the worst family member ever
  • Want to move out because I’m the worst relative they have
  • Hate me
  • Think I’m stupid
  • Want to adopt me (yes that doesn’t make sense but it does to my 5yo)

Now you need to have thick skin to be a parent because really it is quite a thankless role. You’re expected to be and do almost everything for them.

In return they’ll be rude, smelly, lazy and try to ignore every instruction you give them.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s not always like this, it’s only when you want them to do things for themselves or make them tidy, clean or put on sunblock that you can expect their wrath.

So all the time……..

Actually I lie, the last 15 minutes before they fall asleep at night are quite peaceful and lovely.

It’s about now they turn on the charm and you forget they were rude little turds and you kiss them goodnight, usher I LOVE YOU TO THE MOON AND BACK.

Then you go down the hallway, collapse in a heap and ready yourself to do it all again the next day.

But what can you do, it’s what we signed up for. What I do love is the ridiculous reasons that my kids find to be hating on me.

Sometimes it’s all I can do not to laugh, which makes them even angrier. But there are days I just have to laugh and shake my head and hope like hell they are as passionate about life and their future careers as they are about hating me!

15 Ridiculous Reasons My Kids Hate Me

1. I make them put on sunblock – anyone would have thought I was trying to lather them in poison not protection.

2. Night wear must not be left on the floor in the kitchen or lounge and instead put on their bed or in the wash if it’s day 2 or they are feral and have been in them all day (it happens, don’t judge)

3. I refuse to allow sleepovers on a school night because my kids are sleep deficient to start with.

4. They aren’t allowed ice-cream for afternoon tea. Extra hate points if I say no to ice-cream for dessert after using it to bribe them to eat dinner.

5. I make them wear their dress shirt to school on Monday, mega hate points because it means doing up BUTTONS!

6. I refuse to buy Nutella because I might as well sprinkle their toast with pure sugar. Instead I give them honey because it makes me feel better #stillsugar

7. When I win at Uno because I refuse to let my tantrum-throwing son win just so he won’t hate me.

Uno cards game kids hate you.

8. Making my youngest pick up 4 cards in Uno – he either throws in his cards or tells me he’s leaving the family.

9. When I consecutively skip my son’s turn in Uno – this is grounds for him to say ‘I wish you were never born’.

10. The rare occasion I win at Uno the move before my youngest does – by this stage we’re all in hysterics at his screaming about how much he hates me. #competitivemuch?

(just as an aside, the abhorrent behaviour during our evening cards game is usually confined to my beloved youngest child)

11. When I say no to chocolate.

12. Because I refuse to spend $7+ on an ice-cream at a theme park when they are $1 down the road and come with a FLAKE.

13. Whenever they don’t get their way.

14. When I order them to change before we go out in public because they are dirty/too cold/too short/too daggy/their school pants/soft pants.

15. Because I make them wear shoes.

Do tell? What do your kids hate you for right now?

Comments

  1. Well, one hated me about two hours ago for not drying her off to her liking (rough as guts mum). The other will hate me in about 5 minutes for making her get out of her sisters bed and in to her own bed, where she hates her bedroom because it gives her nightmares apparently, where I will state in my frustrated mum voice, “Well leave the bloody light on. Just get in your bloody bed!”

    My brother was a shocker at board games when we were younger. Never forget when he upended a table with our monopoly game on it.

    My youngest got out of her bed last weekend, proceeded to dress (out of her nightie) into her onesie pjays and that’s how she stayed for the day! If only I could do that, I don’t think my crappy old pyjamas would cut it in BWS!

  2. The Big Sister was pretty cross yesterday when I made her find her overdue library books to return to school. Clearly, I am a monster!

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