When strangers tell your kids off!

There are two sorts of old farts who go to a kid’s movie during the school holidays.

1. Grandparents who’ve been roped into taking Sally and Sam and are hoping like hell they don’t wee themselves during the film, the grandkids that is, not them.

2. Old ducks with nothing better to do than sit up the very back row and cast their judging eye on all below them.

I came across both types at the cinema this morning. I saw a lovely old stooped gent helping a toddler get her jumper on and I told him what a great job he was doing. My second encounter wasn’t so pleasant.

We were the first in the theatre because my three were determined to sit in the very back row. Once settled I let them head down to the front of the room to dance in front of the mega screen below. It was hilarious!

I cursed myself for being so organised, we still had 30 minutes until Shaun the Sheep Movie started (a must-see BTW). Why aren’t I this early for important stuff?

Anyway an old duck waddled in, saw myself and the kids at the top and shook her head. She found a place a few seats away from, on the same row, right beside a seat that was broken and was permanently in recline.

My kids hadn’t noticed til the old biddy started flapping it up and down like a kid trying to dislodge a wobbly tooth.

Of course they all wanted a turn on it. Just seconds after my daughter sat down The Wicked Witch of the West said:

“Now you know you can’t do that during the whole movie, you must sit down and be quiet,” and not in a nice, friendly grandparent kid of way.


Well that was a red flag to a bull, I said to her:

“I’ll parent my children thank you and the movie is nowhere near starting. They will be in their seats during it and if they are not then I will tell them off,” spittle flew out of my mouth and almost caught the old duck.

I let the kids finish pretending to sleep in the broken chair, let them fiddle about their seats for a bit and then once the movie was on they didn’t budge, much.

The Wicked Witch of the West was later accompanied by Glinda The Good Witch of the West and they said sipping their coffees. Glinda laughed, Wicked scowled.

My kids were the epitome of well-behaved and my youngest made the theatre laugh when he said loudly ‘look you can see his bum’.

I had to laugh at the kids in front of me – they were making the most annoying sound with their finished drink, they were obviously trying to suck every last drip of coke from their cup.

Beside me the WWW was tsk tsk tsking and I could hear a ‘oh for goodness sake’. I grinned from ear to ear each time the kid sucked harder and got nothing but noisy air.

Point is, if you’re at a kid’s movie during the school holidays then sorry but there will be some noise, maybe a few farts, laughing at fart jokes and mums like me getting up halfway through the film to take a child to the loo.

Keep your parenting and scowling to yourself and most certainly DO NOT tell my kids how to behave. That is my thankless job.

Taken the kids to the movies recently? What did you see?

What do you hate most about going to the movies during school holidays?

Would you have said anything to the WWW?


  1. We were lucky enough to attend the preview of this show and it was fantastic. So many kids in the audience hardly able to contain themselves. It was half the fun.

    We had a neighbour once that was a lot like your WWW, it was just her manner. Couldn’t help herself.

  2. I’ve heard good things about that movie. I haven’t braved the cinema with my kids before, but totes considering it, to see it. Oh agreed, if www wanted peace and quite she should have waited for it to come out on DVD!

  3. Oh dear! Glad you spoke up! X

  4. Why is it that old ducks are either darling, wonderful people or completely sour. Haven’t seen much middle ground. Glad you stood yours. I have seen cinderalla and home. Cried in both. So did the babies in the cinema. Cos it’s school holidays.

  5. Wow. Good on you!
    Out of all the movies in the world why would she choose that one anyway.
    I always feel a little sorry for these people. Life must be tough if you get so worked up about such little things.

  6. On Sunday, a male jerk in the Sydney CBD Peter Alexander told my three year old off in a loud cranky voice for putting a sticker that his colleague had given her on the wall in the manky change room. This is while I was waiting for them to sort out their till problems and quite frankly I was delighted she was entertaining herself. Poor thing was so upset and is still talking about it. She’s a sensitive little poppet.

    I am SO FURIOUS with myself for not sticking up for her. Instead I did the wimpy apology and took it off her. The conversation I should have had has been running around in my head for days. It’s a good learning for me.

  7. Some people just like finding fault with others sadly.
    Word love to see that movie, but I’ll wait til it’s on DVD more cinemas are a little special.

  8. Seriously? If you’re going to go and see Shaun the Sheep: the Movie, you need to expect lots of crazy kiddie antics. After all, IT’S A KIDS MOVIE. If you really want peace and quiet and you must see it at the movie theatre go to a 9.20pm session. I usually take my boys the the pre-midday session on a Sunday. I figure anyone prepared to get out of bed before midday on Sunday to see a kiddie movie is either in the same boat as us or deserves what they get!

  9. Good for you Em! Surely it’s not hard for people to understand – if you are going to a kids movie, expect kids. If you are going in the school holidays, expect more kids! Handy Hubby and I took Miss T to see Shaun last weekend and we all loved it (Mr TT stayed home with my folks – best for everyone involved!)

  10. Yay for you Em. I cannot understand cranky people who think it’s their right to tell other peoples children off. I’m glad you enjoyed the movie and even happier to think how annoying the children in the front slurping their drinks would have been to the Wicked Witch. 🙂 🙂

  11. 🙂

  12. My mum took my daughter to see Shaun the Sheep and I’m really hoping she is on of the nice nanna’s out there!

  13. I want to see Shaun the sheep but not sure I want to venture in on school holidays. There are some rude people out there. I hope your kids enjoyed the movie. Xx

  14. Good on you, I find nothing more irritating than strangers thinking they have the right to discipline my children. If I want their help or advice I will ask for it….now I’m the cranky pants…

  15. Wow, going to a kids’ film and not liking kids being kids. I can’t wait to see Shaun, but seriously it’s not like there are serious and subtle plot points that need to be followed, it’s just raucous fun. Wow, just wow x

  16. You go mother bear!
    I think I would have said something too. I am getting a little braver as I age and my hurricane season frequents every 3 weeks now instead of 4 so I have extra ammunition. A smarty farty pants man got my thoughts today at work and he then just chose to ignore me after that so I must have hit a nerve, he was lucky I didn’t really give to him!
    I say holidays whether it’s movies, restaurants, supermarkets or doctors surgeries will involve kidlets and adults need to accommodate them because they are kidlets not adults.
    Glad the slurpy cup drinker helped you feel a little better.
    Shaun the sheep sounds like a fun movie!
    Have a great weekend!

  17. Oh for goodness sakes, it’s a kid’s movie!! I’m so glad you spoke up Em, I definitely would have too. We had every intention of going to the movies, but Bell’s social life has made for different plans. Looks like it will be SpongeBob at home, some time down the track. x

  18. Oh babe – you so needed to be with me at the movies, I have Glinda’s even nicer sister at our movie. I just dont get people like that, I really dont. It takes so much more freaking effort to be a cranky cow than it does to just shut up or better yet LEAVE if kids are that flipping annoying to you. Good on you for speaking up hun. I dont mind if someone addresses my kids if they are out of line, but when I am there and they are just being kids… Look out. Mama bear is coming!!! xx

  19. FunMumX3 says:

    Agree 100%. But how about this… was out at a Swiss Chalet (do they have that in Oz?) on Friday night with a group of Mums and teens, and a table behind me had noisy toddlers. Noises came and went, a few shrieks. I was totally understanding and didn’t even turn around to check it out lest the parents thought I was being critical. I wanted them to enjoy the night out too and Swiss Chalet is very much a family place. No worries! But…

    When we were leaving, the kids were still noisy. As I turned around to get my bag, I noticed the kids had made a big mess on the table. Still OK and expected with young kids. But here’s the kicker. Both Mum & Dad were sitting, one opposite each kid, with noses almost glued to mobiles. As we left, I mentioned it and another Mum said that they had been glued to their phones that the whole time. I had to re-think my willingness to accept kiddie noise in a restaurant… I love family noise and interactive meals, even/especially in public. Kids need to learn how to behave in a restaurant. But taking out the kiddies and staying nose-in-mobile the whole time while kids are noisy, shreiking and shredding the table?

    Hard not to be judge-y. Good thing they didn’t sit next to your Wicked Witch 🙂

  20. Sometimes people forget they were kids too … and probably were just as curious about everything as children are today. Good response. Hopefully I’ll remember something as articulate as what you said if I run into a similar encounter, (I’m sure I will cause I have 2 cheeky boys) instead of saying “Get lost and mind your own business!” … LOL ….. I wish I had the balls to say that.

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