An interview that nearly ended in divorce – Laugh Linkup

This is quite possibly one of the WORST interviews I have ever conducted.

The person was aloof, a bit rude and tried to end the conversation after just two questions.

But like the professional I am, I forged through.

I was inspired to interview my husband by Kylie Purtell – her hubby played the game much nicer than mine, as did Renee @ Mummy Wife Me’s other half.

Us before kids, about to visit Vanuatu's volcano.

Us before kids, about to visit Vanuatu’s volcano.

Without any further ado.

What is Emily’s most annoying habit?

(After 15 seconds of silence I ask the question again).

There are annoying things about you but I just can’t think what they are.

So I don’t have any then?

Yes do but I just can’t think of any but I know there are times when you’re annoying, I’m trying to think.

(I let this one slide and hope it’s just that he’s nervous).

What is Emily most endearing habit?

I’m going to be crap at this dear.

It means a nice thing about me – what, you can’t think of any nice things AT ALL?

(Laughs) I’m trying to think of somethingย  (I’m starting to get shitty now) .

Ummm…

This is ridiculous – you are ridiculous.

I told you yesterday I would be shit at this.

I don’t want to do this anymore.

(By this stage I’m seriously considering asking for a divorce).

Just one word, one nice thing about me?

Ummmm

(I don’t poke the bear because I know he’s close to ending the conversation and get the shits).

What was the first thing that attracted you to Emily?

Bubbly personality because you were talking to me on the balcony at that gay bar.

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What do you enjoy most about being a dad?

The happiness I get from my three children.

What do you least enjoy about being a dad?

The lack of time to do my own things.

What was your favourite thing to do with Emily pre-kids?

Um, I don’t know. Well I have to censor, but hanging out, getting loose and having a good time.

What is your most hated household chore?

I don’t have to do anything in the house – (then lets out a big laugh).

(Mental note to self to get him to do more domestic duties STAT).

There must be one thing?

It’s not that I hate doing things it’s the time that some things take.

What’s your favourite thing to cook?

Umm chicken nibbles.

What about cooking for the family?

Chicken nibbles.

What do you think annoys Emily most about you?

How I’m almost relaxed to the point of being docile.

What do you think Emily loves most about you?

That I’m a good dad to my children.

Why do you think Emily is lucky to be married to you?

Cos I’m awesome, (laughs to himself).

I don’t know, are you really lucky to be married to me?

I’m beginning to wonder that my self!

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Why do you think you are lucky to be married Emily?

Because you’re a good mum to our children.

What about me personally?

(silence)

(I’m starting to get miffed).

Do you read Emily’s blog?

Occasionally.

How much is occasionally?

Sometimes when I’m told to read it. Sometimes I do.

Why don’t you read it every day?

Because I’m time starved.

You’ve got time to play games onย  your phone?

Yes but you know how flat-out I am at work.

But you could read it when you come home?

Yep I suppose I could.

Are you always right?

Most of the time.

My 243905925_im_not_always_right_but_im_never_wrong_1781_xlarge

Are you a wanker?

What?

Are you a wanker?

That’ s not very nice, I’m a nice person – too nice sometimes hey Emily?

Not to me you’re not.

What?

I mean you’re not too nice to me.

No, but I’m nice to you!

So back to the first one – what is my most annoying habit?

The way you drive, aggressively and sometimes I hate being in the car with you. And it’s funny because you criticise my driving but sometimes your driving is more extreme.

You could also put your temperature control watching of the children in bed at night, but your driving is worse.

And my most endearing habit?

The way you look after our children.

Geez, give a dog a bone, what about how hard working I am, and that I help out others?

You are hard working.

INTERVIEW OVER.

I storm away from computer and remain in a shitty mood for the rest of the evening.

I then make him cook dinner, unload the dishwasher, hang out the washing and bath the kids.

Hanky panky off the menu for months.

And for the record I don’t drive aggressively, I like to call it defensive driving, eg I like to indicate, brake with plenty of time to spare but I also take note of what’s happening 50 metres in front of me and so often change lanes frequently to avoid an upcoming hazard.

Unlike SOME people I know who brake late and rarely indicate.

See, your husband isn’t that bad after all hey?

Anyone care to tell me one endearing habit of mine?

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I’m also joining in with my fellow Monday linky ladies!

Ann over at Help!! I’m Stuck for I Must Confess

Alicia over at One Mother Hen for Open Slather Mondayย 

Eva @ The Multitasking Mummy for Mummy Mondays

Comments

  1. Bahahaha. I snorted out loud in the dark whilst feeding and reading this! Such typical husband responses. I’m wanting to do this with my man and I have to wonder if divorce will be on the cards in my house too!
    Ps – I’m sure you’re a very good driver ๐Ÿ˜‰

  2. I interviewed my hubby over the weekend and will be including the results on the blog tomorrow. Interestingly, my mother-in-law is staying with us at the moment and contributed to the interview. I was worried ours would end in divorce or worse and it still might.

  3. I love the part about being so relaxed he’s almost docile. Sounds like my hubby ๐Ÿ™‚ And we met in a gay bar too, SNAP! Ahh you poor guys. Sometimes it’s not easy to be interviewed. All answers just disappear out of your head. I think you did a great job though – you had me laughing xx

  4. merilyn says:

    i’ll support you em! … you are lovely!
    not sickly sweet but the genuine business!
    mmmmm he’s in the dog house!
    i’ll come to his defence now
    men hate answering those personal questions
    I think they aren’t thinking about those things generally!
    unlike women who love those questions and have multiple answers at the ready!
    you are a good guy! not sure about him??? ;0
    lol m:)X

  5. I wrote a comment then my stupid internet dropped out! I hope you don’t get this message twice. I force my hubby to not only read my blog every day but to share it with his mates on Facebook as well. He sounds like a lovely and funny guy Emily, a good match for you ๐Ÿ™‚

  6. Bahahhahahhahahahha! Awkward much!!

  7. Haha this isn’t the worst interview… its the best!! So funny! Your hubby sounds like a great, honest, cruisy guy!! xx

  8. I feel your man’s pain. Hanky Panky off the menu for a few months? Geez! Did he also run over a puppy or something. A bit harsh Em? ๐Ÿ™‚

  9. Ask and you shall receive. I think many of us would have similar responses from our men. It certainly makes for a funny read however. Something for you to treasure. Do you battle about who is right in your house maybe ? This week I felt like joining in am making a laugh of a crappy day I had last week. Not sure if I succeed but it’s out there now. Thanks for the laugh x

  10. Your husband is as articulate as my husband ๐Ÿ˜‰

  11. I’ve contemplated doing this with Trent but I figured all his answers would be dirty. I asked him a few questions the other night as we were going to bed and like I thought most of his answers were dirty. He said its ok it wasnt real and I can ask him again properly when its not late at night lol. Yet to decide if I will or not.

  12. At least you got more than one word answers. Your driving sounds fine to me. Mick taught me to drive and we nearly ended up in divorce but at least I can claim that it’s his fault if I’m a bad driver. Not that I am. Nope. No way. Ahem. Thanks for the giggles. xo

  13. Love it! And you both lived to tell the tale!

  14. You make me laugh, that’s endearing. And I bet you make him laugh too – when he’s not doing the dishes or cooking chicken nibbles ๐Ÿ˜‰

  15. This is hilarious Em!! Poor Mr Have a Laugh – do you think he’ll be reading this one??? I’ve warned Mr D that an interview is coming his way, so he better get his answers ready!! And he better not be mentioning my driving!!!!! xxx

  16. Ha! I might have to try this, although I’m not sure his answers would be appropriate for public consumption…… Great post Emily.

  17. Thanks Em, been having a SHIT few days and this made me snort with laughter. Thanks for putting a smile on my face.

  18. Dave never reads my blog. Unless there is something specific I ask him to read. Or I leave the laptop on with it up on the screen, then he might have a quick read. Unless of course he is lying and he does actualy read it but never tells me, but I highly doubt it! Thanks for joining in, I am definitely gonna have to add a linky to the original post I think!

  19. I’ve heard it said you are very tall. Does this mean from the photos that you’ve married a giant?

    (But not a conversational giant, obviously.)

  20. LOL sounds like you have met your match Em, in more ways than one!

  21. I wonder if he read this blog post? I liked his interview even if it wasn’t typical – I think it was better than a normal one :o).

  22. You are genuine and find humor in the little things. It would take a year for us to complete this interview because my husband likes to take his time when he thinks about answers. You’d think I’d have more patience, nope.

  23. Oh god!!! I laughed so hard I had a coughing fit and then I cried!! Kieran asked if I was reading something sad and I regained composure and said no it’s funny. I haven’t laughed like that in ages!!! I can see this all unfolding too in my kind. Oh god! That was hilarious!! I’ve seen you drive… You talk to yourself (or the kids in the back or hands free but on Friday it definitely looked like you were chatting to yourself… And answering)
    Love ya em and love ya work xxx
    Well done k too ๐Ÿ™‚

  24. Haha well I’d get him onto those household chores right away! ๐Ÿ˜‰

  25. I am wondering what sort of answers I would get from my hubby. It would probably have me shitty with frustration too. He would have no problem with telling me what annoys him about me and I fear he might not have anything nice to say! Eek!

  26. Love it! I fear that if I was to interview Paul that it would go much the same as this..after I explained to him that no people will not start stalking him on the internet because he is not ON the internet enough for anyone to care!

  27. You make me laugh and you write nice comments on my blog!!??
    I think that’s endearing! ๐Ÿ™‚
    This cracked me up!

  28. That is hilarious Em. I hope it doesn’t end in divorce though! x

  29. That made me giggle so much. x

  30. Oh dear, so that was an interesting experience. So interesting I am considering trying it out with Mr Sparky.

  31. Ah men… it’s a love/hate relationship. They really are terrible at answering questions and tend to have a serious case of foot in mouth syndrome when it comes to complimenting their wife. I wouldn’t get better answers from my husband either. I may have to interview him soon to see what answers I get.

  32. You are a brave woman to even consider interviewing your husband. I daren’t even try! Good on you for putting him to work after:-)

  33. This did put you in dangerous territory – but you’re still getting your office right, and no divorce?! PS – I think our hubbies would get on very well.

  34. Hilarious Em!
    You crack me up! I can’t wait to post mine once I’ve got my computer back.

  35. I will state right now that I would never interview my husband as he is a smart-arse and would not take any of it seriously! Maybe we could get him to interview you Em – that could be interesting (for him AND for us!)

  36. LMAO OK I am now officially too terrified to do this with my hubby ๐Ÿ˜‰ x

  37. That’s hilarious! I’m now wondering what it’d be like to interview my husband.

  38. Haha! Don’t worry – I would be peeved too. So typical!

    But look on the bright side, he knew he’d be shit and gave us a laugh.

  39. Em, you got much more than I think I would! They’re not so keen to be put on the spot, are they? But guess what? Your interview is pretty fabulous!
    And for the record, I think you have many more than just one endearing habit, your genuine caring for others being just the start xx

  40. Oh my goodness Em that was the funniest thing I have read in ages!! Your hubby is a classic!! I loved this!!

  41. LOVED IT! I’m not even trying to do this! You made me laugh out loud with your last image!

  42. That is gold love.

  43. This one made me shake with laughter! Too funny!

  44. Hilarious ๐Ÿ™‚ Thank you I enjoyed the laugh!

  45. A man of many words! Lol gosh I was cracking up reading this. Soooooo fun. You need to kiss & make up now or get loose as your hubby put it ๐Ÿ™‚ xxx

  46. I think our husbands may be related……..

Trackbacks

  1. […] the ball rolling with her interview of her husband, Dave. Then Renee at Mummy Wife Me and Emily at Have A Laugh On Me followed suit. Check them all out, they are hilarious! Since so many of my #TeamIBOT crew were […]

  2. […] the great Kylie Purtell started. Then other cool cats like Renee at Mummy, Wife, Me and Em over at Have A Laugh On Me also went there and a whole gaggle of bloggy stars, so now it’s my […]

  3. […] A Laugh On Me shared An interview that nearly ended in divorce! This is quite possibly one of the WORST interviews I have ever conducted. The person was aloof, a […]

  4. […] It was pretty brutal I have to say. You can read the full transcriptionย here, take your time, it’s worth the 1.5 minutes because I’ve been told it’s rather […]

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