Six signs you’re a Harry Hoarder! – Laugh Linkup

Are you the sort of person that keeps the buttons you get with new clothes?

You know the ones in a nice little baggie?

I used to keep them, but not because I’ll actually ever sew, because I have a habit of keeping things I don’t need, like an alarm clock.

Hand on my heart I have NEVER used one of the dozen buttons I used to have lying around in my bathroom basket of crap awesomeness!

I figure if a button comes off my shirt it’s either a. been worn for too long b. was ripped off during a random act of randiness c. a poorly made piece of clothing that’s not worth fixing.

buttonsImage

Buttons and wrinkles aren’t the only useless things I have gathered over the years, in fact there’s quite a few things I can’t bring myself to throw out!

Maybe I’m actually a…. hoarder! This definition by the hilarious Urban Dictionary made me laugh.

“Bitches who don’t know when to get rid of absolutely useless shit that they own. They tend to defend their possessions by saying that they “need” the material possessions.”

It kinda sounds like me.

I’ve written up a quick checklist to help you figure out whether YOU might be guilty of stashing useless things just because you can.

You know you’re a hoarder if:

1. In your bathroom cupboard there are shower caps, sewing kits and random bottles of shampoos, body wash and conditioners that you have fleeced from hotels/motels/cabins/a posh friend’s house.

shampoo

2. You keep instruction manuals for EVERY kid’s toy or electrical appliance you have ever owned.

3. Shopper dockets with discounts on random goods and services that you’ll never use have started to form colonies in your handbag.

4. Look in your pantry – do you have leftover party bag offerings from months ago? Or maybe tea bags/coffee sachets you’ve flogged from hotels/motels/cabins/your mum’s house.

5. In your drawer there are chargers for your old Nokia phones just in case analog comes back in fashion and you need to charge that baby up!

6.  The top of your microwave looks like…

I'm not usually one to judge but this is a disgrace! (gives self a good talking to)

I’m not usually one to judge but this is a disgrace! (gives self a good talking to)

If you answered yes to more than one of these then you are a Harry Hoarder and welcome to my world!

 Got buttons?

Can you add any more signs that you’re a hoarder?

What do you secretly or not-so-secretly snuffle away for a rainy day?

 

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I’m also joining in with my fellow Monday linky ladies!

Kirsty from at My Home Truths for I Must Confess

Alicia over at One Mother Hen for Open Slather Monday 

Eva @ The Multitasking Mummy for Mummy Mondays

Comments

  1. merilyn says:

    morning em!
    buttons and bits of thread even?!?! … I am a hoarder … I have excuses excuses! it’s my story!
    I use things in my art I am a “hunter and collector” of debris … it lights my candle! and floats my boat!
    I make installations with my found objects and bits of tat … I have a goddess of abundance table but she is a little snowed under and weighed down at the mo! … love it! … my microwave does not look like yours tho!;0
    <3 m:)X

  2. Oh crap I’m a hoarder! I have receipts stashed everywhere and toy manuals lol I don’t even know whyI keep them.

  3. 7. You have little bits of leftover things in your fridge that will NEVER get eaten – half a serve of rice here, a lone sausage there, a soggy bit of lettuce that you don’t want to discard until you’ve bought more lettuce…

  4. Ha ha, I’m an anti-hoarder. Buttons go out with the price tags. The downside is sometimes I throw out things in a fit of cleaning up that I realise later would actually have been quite useful.

  5. Having moved 22 times, my ability to hoard has, up until recently, been kept pretty much in check. I’m slightly concerned when we do move next, once we sell our NSW property and purchase our dream home forever, here in Perth that the hoarding gates will be opened and I’ll start hoarding like never before.

    Funnily enough, I have kept all the spare buttons over the years but I actually did get around to using them all in the one go. My daughter needed a vest with a hundred buttons on it for a school play. Of course my lack of sewing ability meant they kept popping off all over the place.

  6. Oh yes, I keep those buttons – just in case. Will also admit to the odd shower cap and sewing kit – but they’re there for a purpose… for the myriad of visitors frequenting my guest bathroom (ie. my mum who brings her own stuff!).

    Oh I’ll also confess to some old phones and cords but now you mention it – have no bloody idea why I still have them!

  7. I am not a hoarder. I throw so much shit out. I love it.

  8. Hi, my name is Eva and I am a hoarder!
    I have all the same things as you in my cupboards and I have a VERY bad habit of not finishing a bottle of something before opening the new one and so I have cupboards full of half used creams, shampoos, hair products, coffee, tea…you name it!

  9. Don’t open any wardrobe, cupboard or drawer without your hard hat and safety gear on around here. You never know what may fall out and attack you. I think that makes me a ‘hider’ of all things ‘hoarding’ :/

  10. I’m a reformed hoarder, Em. I used to keep everything and though I still need occasional support form Hoarders Anonymous (ie: my anti-hoarder hubby) I’m actually discovering that getting rid of all the shit I don’t need or use is liberating! 🙂

  11. Phew, I’m not but my husband is a huge Harry Hoarder! 🙂

  12. Hubby is a hoarder. I am not. It makes for some interesting times! I had to learn early on in our marriage NEVER EVER throw out the junk mail & catalogues. So now I put them in a neat basket waiting for him to read them (and waiting … waiting … waiting). Trouble is it doesn’t take long before it overflows and everything’s a mess again so I throw some out and then I’m in trouble – talk about a Catch 22!

  13. Yes to all of them except the microwave which only has cereals on top of it – I do have a 15 drawer merchants chest in the dining room though every one of which is full to bursting but doesn’t contain a single useful thing!

  14. I hoard the spare buttons too! Why? And Mick is the worst person in the world for hoarding motel coffee/tea/soap. He doesn’t consider it a successful trip unless we come home with another stash!

  15. I am a hoarder but we have moved 3 times in 7 years so hopefully I am getting better! I keep things for sentimental value….

  16. I’m more your bad dad joke horder. My kids have been asking for new material instead of the same old gags being trotted out time and time again.

  17. Last week I swapped my desk with teacher next to me. She helped me empty the draws…..oh the shame! I told her this was when she discovered that I was a secret horder. But it was what I needed to get by butt into gear. I went to the $2 shop and bought several desk organisers and baskets and now it is super neat and organised (and I discovered that in my desk I had 22 glues sticks and 1000 whiteboard pens).

  18. You know what?? I think if someone joined you and I together we would make one perfect person! I’m the total opposite of a hoarder… which means I throw things out that I really shouldn’t. I used to work with a gorgeous older lady who would grab stuff out of my bin at work because she thought I shouldn’t be throwing it out!!!

  19. Definitely a hoarder here! I keep those buttons and I can’t even sew! Apart from that, I do have instruction manuals to everything, I have stuff in my pantry I occasionally find from 2007 {which I then throw!} as well as bits and pieces for ‘just in case…’ moments. Oh and at my parents’ place, I have notes from my undergrad days…you know, just in case! 😛

  20. I didn’t answer yes to any of your other questions but I do have a big stash of buttons in little plastic bags that I am sure I will use one day…won’t I??

  21. Oh. My. God.
    I’m totally a hoarder and I didn’t even know it. I actually tick all of the boxes in this informative yet mildly anxiety-provoking post. Tomorrow I’m going on a ruthless throwing-out spree. Maybe…

  22. I love a good basket of crap! My problem is that I have so many of them scattered around the house (interspersed at regular intervals with piles of crap) that I never know which one I’ve thrown (insert item I need RIGHT NOW) into…

  23. Hilarious! Yes, I’m a hoarder, BIG TIME, but mine takes a very odd form. I collect things, not nice things. I collect things like egg cartons. I now have a stack of them a metre high in the cupboard, because… well, I saw on Pinterest… then I forgot… then I thought I might as well keep them for when we get chickens and need to give away the eggs… Still no chickens and exactly how many eggs am I planning to give away? … Now, I’ve been collecting them for so long I feel a loyalty to them, we’ve become friends in that time… Perhaps I could give them names… Or maybe I should cut the apron strings.
    Egg cartons free to good home x

  24. I do have buttons, ones I never use. They all go in a jar in an old hat box, full of ribbons and threads, sticky tape, raffia and all sorts of other useless bits. I hate clutter, but I do tend to accumulate stuff, I am good at culling when I need to, or I get sick of seeing it!

  25. Yes I’m a Harry Hoarder! Sorry I missed the link this week but I had to go to stupid work 🙁

  26. You were describing ME Em! Except I have no room on top of my microwave to store things anymore – that’s the only reason why it’s clear of crap for the first time in years!!!!

  27. I have 1 million buttons, textbooks from my son when he was still in nursery and this reminds me I need to get rid of them! Linking up my guest post over at Mrs. Tee’s blog! Happy Monday Em!

  28. This is hilarious! I can relate to every single one of these! I’ve also got 10 boxes of baby clothes in the garage whilst still accepting clothes from people. Just I’m case I want another! NOT xxx

  29. My mother-in-law once offered me her swimmers that she’d kept from the 1960’s. The elastic had gone stiff! Don’t get that bad. 🙂

  30. 1, 2, 4 and 5 – GUilty! Holy shitballs I am a hoarder!!!!! 🙂 xx

  31. I don’t consider myself a hoarder but I confess that we have a huge box of those tiny bottles of soap and shampoos from hotels/motels/travels. I don’t know why I keep them since I would never use them on myself.

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