It’s been a full week since I have typed on a keyboard, oh my goodness it’s soooooooooo nice to have a break from your everyday life isn’t it?
Sometimes you don’t know you are suffocating until it’s too late.
I’ve just made the kid’s school lunches and for the first time EVER I wasn’t moaning because I couldn’t find the right lid for the container I keep my daughter’s green beans in.
I was almost smiling as I rifled through the Tupperware drawer! Who the heck am I?
Today I have put up the Christmas tree in perfect harmony with my three children, I’ve spent time playing bingo, doing puzzles and have also had time to sit down and listen as my 4-year-old talked about the most important thing in the world to him.
For the first time since being a mum nearly 8-years-ago I have had a break.
My heart and my soul is full.
I had no idea how much I was worn down by my every day life until I had 5 days without it.
I can’t explain it but it’s as though there is no weight upon my shoulders, as I sit here typing I have a spring in my fingers, I feel grateful.
As the plane took off en route to our home I shed a secret tear, sadness at leaving but grateful that I was close to seeing my children again and hoping that our flight home was safe.
It sounds silly but we’re living in a world so different to the one that I grew up in, you can’t take safety and happiness for granted. Never.
The cuddles that enveloped us as we arrived were magical, they reminded me of why I valued my existence so much. They are the reason I live, to give them the happiest life I can.
So as I write this it’s been 36 hours since we’ve been home and I have not got cranky once. I have got down on one knee and listened to my baby as he spoke about things that mattered to him.
I’ve listened as my daughter spoke about how she is sad because her best friend doesn’t like her as much as she likes her. My heart ached having to tell her that sometimes certain people feel feelings more than others and that that’s okay.
Then I gave my son a big hug for no reason. Just because.
My heart and shoulders are light, they are carefree. Gosh I needed to get away. Do you know what I mean?
It’s so hard trying to find the balance in life, but often getting away from those that you can’t bear to be parted from is exactly what you need.
Not being needed is blissful. It makes you want to feel needed. Does that even make any sense?
Also, thank you so much mum and dad, you have no idea how much you are loved by your grandies…. and me!