As I cracked the whip and lost my shit about something as silly as shoelaces the other morning, reality hit me in the face.
I am a bloody cranky pants!
And more often than not it’s the small, silly things that set me off.
Shitburgers, that’s not the sort of parent I want to be!
So I’ve taken it upon myself to write a few ‘inspirational’ messages to keep things in perspective.
Here’s the first one in the pantry.
If this doesn’t work, then while I’m making up three lunch boxes* from stuff in and around the fridge, and listening to the kids saying: “Yuk, I won’t eat that” or “Mum why don’t you have a willy?” – I have another strategically placed note to try to help reduce my
cranky pants stress levels.
So once everyone is dressed, teeth brushed, hair sprayed to keep the nits away, school bags packed, and water bottles refilled after they have already spilled throughout bags, it’s time to get in the car.
This is when I strap in the kids, turn on the car, air-con and radio, it usually calms the little people for a bit. It gives me two minutes to get out of my daggy, dirty home clothes and breathe for 30 seconds. I then look at myself in the mirror to make sure that I don’t have my shirt on inside out, and yes I’ve actually done this :(.
As I walk past the garage to my bedroom, I can hear screams, tears and fighting, but I resist the urge to give my ‘angels’ a stern look or head shake, and instead I head to my bathroom to slap on some brown stuff, aka foundation, to make myself appear ‘not so old haggish’!
By the time I return to the kids it’s bad, and I mean tears, screams, pinching and shit, it’s all I can do to not to scream my tits off at them.
BUT – I look down and see my strategically placed note that says:
I must admit it’s only early days in “Project: Calm Down Mum” – but I will keep you posted on my progress.
I was motivated to start this
stupid simple project after hearing my daughter scream at her younger brother for something so silly as shoelaces dropping something of hers.
And I thought, where did she learn this behaviour?
It ain’t pretty and I’m working to make sure that it doesn’t continue.
So if you’re keen to do a similar thing, then post, Instagram, Pin, Twin, Tumblr, Tweet, or Facebook about it – spread the word and let’s try to be less cranky
pants parents, here is the handle, or whatever, for it: #projectcalmdownmum.
All you have to do is write an honest note to yourself – keeping it simple here folks!
Watch this space, it might just be the start of something amazeballs
Are you game to play along?
What would your yellow note say?
Got a better fridge magnet than my one?
*Umm it should be called an everything box, not a lunch box, because I don’t just pack lunch, I pack morning tea, afternoon tea, mid-morning tea, mid-afternoon tea, when I’m cranky tea, you get the message.
Rewinding with Bron and Sonia for Weekend Rewind